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who cheats more and are we supposed to be monogamous?

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science shows that man cheat more then women and I think it makes evolutionary sense. I agree men are less monogamous.they are supposed to impregnate many women to continue our species their genetics. I think we are supposed to be monogamous both men and women.because its hard to raise a child even two people cant always do it. there's a phrase "it takes a village to raise a child" I agree its a hard thing.I think the more people doing it the more likely better child will be, they will see many points of view, have more people to talk do during hard times my worst fear in a relationship is my spouse cheating,I have some very bad family experiences with cheating it teared my family apart, now I cant see half my family because they are not all biological and my biological family will get mad and it all happened from cheating from an accidental pregnancy. I hope that people are supposed to be monogamous. I would never even consider a polygamous or open relationship. so who do you think cheats more? are people supposed to be monogamous?
 

missy23232323

Active Member
Interesting thing about monogamy is, I think, dependent on each person. I believe if one loves another well enough, then the one wont cheat. i think men used to cheat more but it is changing now because we are more empowered today to do more things and whatever we want. In the past our role tend to be a homemaker or housewife who sits all day at home living a pretty sheltered life. But we no longer want to be confined in such limited role now. I think we women have our right to live and enjoy to the extent similar to guys.
I have to confess I have cheated in my own relationship but it happened because my boyfriend was getting less interested in me. I could sensed that we were drifting apart to a point where we almost didnt care what each of us did. He might even have cheated before I did, something I never found out but in the end it didnt really mattered anymore.
I believe it is important to have a mature discussion on this when it happened...like we can still maintain our friendship and understanding without going on an all out war on each other.
 

bewoow

Member
I think its both sexes that do that - and yes we can be monogamous, but you really have to want that one, or end what does have no future anymore, that is the worst problem.
 

Catapult

New Member
I will agree that both sexes are perfectly capable of cheating. While monogamy is a beautifully thing, the way it is handled in modern society can cause problems. It is my understanding that monogamy was introduced to western Europe around 600's along with the Bible. And until very recently human life spans were considerably shorter. Finding and keeping love/responsibility is much easier if you only have to do it for a maxim of 20 years and being caught cheating could ruin your life.
Hello 20th century, we are no longer being punished by the law/church for cheating and life spans are much higher. But there is still the social stigma, which is in my opinion the main problem.
If a bloke fancies another girl he can't just go to his gf and talk about it. Her reaction would typically lead to a number of negative out comes. Fear of losing her, she gets paranoid/jealous, she thinks he thinks she's not good enough/enough. They are the presieved normal reactions, society tells us that's what we should feel. So he won't tell her.
So a little while later he somehow ends up cheating, and is riddled with guilt. He still can't talk to her about it for the same reasons. Stuck to live with guilt forever or change the dynamics (break up, tell himself it wasn't his fault, continue cheating).
Equally being single isn't forgiving either. Someone can easily be labeled a "slut", "whore" or other such derogatory terms, sometimes based off little to nothing.
Long term relationships especially are intense and people develop issues, some of which can't be addressed or fixed and the east option is to find escapes.
The main problems are communication, acceptance and being open. Practice a little more of that and instead of cheating we get arrangements/agreements, issues might not have time to take root and we end up with a more aceptive community.
I only give this as an example as I accept that the situation is individual to each person.
We are either monogamous or not. Factors can be nature, nurture, influence and constant flux. The sooner we can accept who we are and not who we/society wants us to be, the sooner we find our ideal situation.

I hope my opinion is a thought provoking one :)
 

Christinegirl

Moderator
Staff member
A romantic relationship is so personal and intimate that I think a lot of people feel betrayed and cheated on if their significant other isn't faithful. I've observed that a lot of men aren't strong enough to stay faithful/monogamous.
 

Solitaire

Administrator
Staff member
Would you please be good enough Not to bump such old threads, this one being almost three years old.
As yet I've simply haven't got the time to search and close these threads.
Thank You.
 
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