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What does this guy want?


New Member
I would really appreciate some insight and perspective on this problem of mine.
This guy who I had a few dates with last year responded to my text to catch up with an enthusiastic yes. He also mentioned that he had a girlfriend and would have to ask her but that it ‘shouldn’t be too much of an issue’. I did not know about the girlfriend. Now I am wondering about his intentions. We did really like each other but had to stop seeing each other because it became a long-distance relationship. Now I am moving back to where he lives hence why I texted to catch up. I don’t understand why you would want to meet with an ex if you are happy in your relationship. I don’t want to hurt anyone by agreeing to meet. Should I meet with him bearing in mind that I would like to keep in touch (but under no circumstances get involved with his relationship!)?
We weren’t friends before (we dated) so I am confused as to what his intentions are?


Staff member
It's hard to know what someone's intentions are, what's going on in their minds. Hopefully he just wants to be friends with you and has no intention of cheating on his girlfriend.

If you'd like to keep him as a friend, then I would agree to see him again (maybe for coffee) and catch up.
If your intention was to resume dating him again, I'd probably tell him (something like): "I don't feel comfortable seeing you again as you already have a girlfriend." He should leave it at that. If he still wants to see you, he might be the kind of guy who doesn't mind cheating on a significant other - in which case, you may want to stay away from him (because how much can he be trusted to be faithful in a relationship).

The fact that he wants to pass it by his girlfriend, first, is a good sign - that maybe he has no ill intent. :)