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Should talk with him or not

Should I talk with him or not

  • Yes

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • No

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    0

Enigma

New Member
I know I may sound weird here but I'm really confused and frustrated over this situation. So two I hooked up with with my tutor two years. He's just five years older than me so it's an issue for me I'm completely fine with it. Everything went well for an year. Before starting everything we promised that we'll involve no feelings in this. Just lust and I agreed with it. But after being with him for an year changed everything. He was really caring towards me, we shared our darkest secrets, everything about our personal lives, we became real close. We always had each other's back if anything happened. Though he sometimes said this that he loves I just shrugged it off. I definitely developed feelings for him but whenever he asked I denied it. But after an year we were caught by my mom while sexting. She asked us to away from each other. We accepted it and didn't talk for 8 months. Then he suddenly texted me and we started talking again. I still love. My feelings for him are just getting stronger than fading away. We started talking like friends and caught up on everything we have missed. Since it was lock down so I couldn't meet him. He told that when we parted he missed me, he fought the urge to hug me whenever we crossed paths, and blah blah. But after lock down he went to his home town and met a girl there and fell for her(that's what he told me but I'm not sure if this is true) . He said he was pretty serious regarding this relationship. He asked me again that I love him or not and he then one he told me that he got a new girlfriend and asked me if I was jealous as if I was going to say yes. It hurt me a lot that he found someone. So I started ignoring a bit. But he still kept trying for me. Then I asked him sternly to stay away from me . And it's almost two months now since we have talked. I want him so bad I just can't tell anyone. I miss him a lot after all he's my first love. So should I talk with him and try to get him back or should I move on.
 

Christinegirl

Well-Known Member
That's a good question, hon. Either;
he has a girlfriend (in which case he's emotionally cheating on her) or
he doesn't have a girlfriend (in which case he's just trying to make you jealous - possibly because he thinks that'll make you have feelings for him).

I would ask him: "If I did/do love you, would you leave your girlfriend for me?" If he would,
how much does he care about her and
how much is he just using her because he can't have you (and would you want to get involved with someone who uses people - no matter how much you might love him).

Also, I wonder if he got involved with someone else for those eight months but it didn't work out. So then he contacted you again.

My personal opinion is: in order for a relationship to be healthy, there needs to be honesty and openness from both sides.
 

Tommyli

New Member
Hi!
I think it is better for yourself to leave it, what Christine said. If he can’t be honest with his girlfriend or if he is lying about that he have a girlfriend he could possible do the same to you. A healthy relationship needs to begin with honesty and openness. I hope you will make the good decisions for yourself.
 

Enigma

New Member
That's a good question, hon. Either;
he has a girlfriend (in which case he's emotionally cheating on her) or
he doesn't have a girlfriend (in which case he's just trying to make you jealous - possibly because he thinks that'll make you have feelings for him).

I would ask him: "If I did/do love you, would you leave your girlfriend for me?" If he would,
how much does he care about her and
how much is he just using her because he can't have you (and would you want to get involved with someone who uses people - no matter how much you might love him).

Also, I wonder if he got involved with someone else for those eight months but it didn't work out. So then he contacted you again.

My personal opinion is: in order for a relationship to be healthy, there needs to be honesty and openness from both sides.
Thank you so much for your advice I'll talk with him about this briefly. I don't want to be a tissue for him. I don't know whats going on his mind but when we talk I'll be back here for may be thanking you or another advice
 

Enigma

New Member
Hi!
I think it is better for yourself to leave it, what Christine said. If he can’t be honest with his girlfriend or if he is lying about that he have a girlfriend he could possible do the same to you. A healthy relationship needs to begin with honesty and openness. I hope you will make the good decisions for yourself.
Yes I'm gonna face him and not be a coward anymore. Thank you for caring for me.
 
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