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Question about what my bf did

Hey ya'll!

I just need some advice. Months ago I sent my bf a "gift idea" and I NEVER do that because I am always so indecisive and never know what I want for my birthday or the holidays, so this means that I really wanted it. Mind you, my birthday and holidays are all in December and I sent him this back in the summer so that's how you know I really wanted it. It was a really cute necklace. Today was his sisters birthday, she sent me a photo that said "Look what my brother got me for a gift" and it was the exact necklace that I sent him. Mind you, she has no idea that I wanted that necklace. Should I be pissed at him? Am I selfish to be mad? I honestly got mad at him but I think its really fucked up with him knowing the circumstances.
 

Christinegirl

Moderator
Staff member
What was his explanation when you told him it was the exact necklace you asked him to get for you?

How does he treat you the rest of the time? In other words, could he be mad at you and this was his way of "getting back" at you?
 
What was his explanation when you told him it was the exact necklace you asked him to get for you?

How does he treat you the rest of the time? In other words, could he be mad at you and this was his way of "getting back" at you?
He treats me awesome and this was definitely not a way of him getting back at me
 

Christinegirl

Moderator
Staff member
I gather you explained to him that it was more than "just a necklace" and that you didn't/don't want other gifts for the holidays. (Maybe it's to his advantage to not understand where you're coming from.)

Did he explain why he chose that particular necklace for his sister? Had you given him a picture of the necklace you wanted, details of where to buy it, etc. and maybe he forgot that it was for you, he saw the information and thought to himself: "Oh, that would make a nice present for my sister!" (but he doesn't want to admit to you that he forgot he was supposed to buy it for you)? I know some guys don't listen to their wife/girlfriend when she says something to the guy (and then later on he says he forgot), but if you sent your boyfriend a "gift idea" in the written word, :D that should have helped him to remember.

Ultimately, whether you should be angry at him or not depends on what his intentions were. As he treats you well the rest of the time, hopefully he didn't have any ill intent.

My advice would be: from now on, if you see something you'd like, ask him for the money for it and tell him you'll buy it (like you're his personal shopper), that you'll even wrap it and put it under the tree. It wouldn't be a surprise for you anyway (even if he bought it for you) because you told him what you wanted. That way, you'll get the gift you want, he doesn't even have to go shopping, and if he gives the same gift to someone else, you can immediately show the person your gift (so others don't think you're just copying them). ;)
 
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