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Need advice


New Member
Hi girls. This is VERY long winded so apologies in advance. I need advice, and please don’t call me stupid, even though I am. Basically I have a friends with benefits. We were FWBs for about a year and a half. He’s made it clear from the start that he doesn’t want to be with me. However, when we do what we do, we chill together and I stay over (which I’m telling you now is NOT a good idea, as feelings start to occur). Anyway, I got pregnant with him. He didn’t want it, I didn’t think I could cope alone and wasn’t ready for a baby, so I had an abortion. I know people might think this is terrible, and I do occasionally regret this decision, and it’s something that will live with me forever. I’m not looking for sympathy but it was harder for me as I had feelings for him, and he didn’t with me. He actually thought it was great that I got rid and literally said ‘I’m glad it’s dead’. Anyway, silly me still went with him after this. He’s had a girlfriend and blocked me, then they split up, he messaged me and I went running back. Somethings turned in my head where I’m thinking I need to end this now, but I think it’s so hard getting over him and handling rejection. Can anyone give me any advice on getting over him and/ or handling the rejection that he’d never want to be with me. Thanks for reading girls x


Sounds as if this guy is a REAL PRICK!!!! No other way to say it. Why oh why are you wasting your time on a worthless "so called" human being????

My only thoughts are that too bad his mother didn't have an abortion!!!!


Staff member
Well, isn't he charming - not! :oops: Gee, I wonder why he and his girlfriend broke up?! I'm glad you're thinking you need to end this now - that's very wise and mature on your part.
Dump his sorry butt and reject him, hon!
He doesn't want you now - he's just using you for a free orgasm. He doesn't respect you.

Please don't call yourself stupid, because that's just name calling. ;) You care about him. And even though it isn't emotionally healthy or wise to care for someone who abuses us, it has nothing to do with your level of intelligence. Us women are often "wired" to fall in love with someone with whom we have such an intense, intimate experience with.

I'm sure you realize that he doesn't care about you, that he's only using and abusing you. Please don't let him. You deserve so much better than this.

We can't help whom we love so what I suggest is, try to spend time with other people - be so busy that you don't have time to even think about him. Hopefully you'll find someone else that you can grow to love. This FWB's guy needs to be "replaced". (You can always tell him you're tired of him, he doesn't satisfy you anymore, etc.) Replacing him with other interests/activities is the best way you can emotionally distance yourself from him, I feel. (And maybe don't have sex with anyone until you're sure the new guy loves you. There are too many men in this world who will just use a woman if she'll let him. No one needs that kind of person in their life.)