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Looking at other females


New Member
Why do guys always look at other females?? You could be in the middle of a conversation and they stop to gawk. I think it’s rude when you have a girlfriend especially when she is right there.

Should I be so bothered by this?? How do I not be ? Should I not say anything when I see it happen?


Staff member
Because they're not emotionally and behaviorally strong (though they can be when they want to be!) The book (in my signature) explains it very well.

It is rude and disrespectful to you, especially when you're right there! I don't know your boyfriend but I wouldn't be surprised if he'd be the first to complain if you checked out other guys when you were with him, especially when he's in the middle of speaking to you.

You have every right to be bothered by this, hon. You could say something but I doubt it would help. If anything, he might get mad/annoyed at you, accuse you of all kinds of things (you're "nagging" him, you're "making a big deal out of nothing", "it doesn't mean anything, why do you have to be so...", etc.) and try to make you feel like you're the bad guy in all of this!

What it comes down to is; which is worse for you: leaving him and not having him in your life or having him in your life, having him cheat on you (because assume he is cheating on you - one way or another) and maybe having him leave you eventually anyway because he won't respect you? In his mind, he'll think: "Why does she put up with me cheating on her? She can't think much of herself if she's willing to put up with my abuse so why should I think highly of her?" (even though you put up with him because you love him - but he won't see it like that).

I know women who stayed with their man, hoping things would get better but they never did. The women just ended up being miserable. Maybe your man can change - but don't be surprised if he doesn't.