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I decided to become mute

Shhhone

New Member
So recently it came to my attention that for me in order to live it would be best to become mute. I don't feel like my words make difference or even if people believe what I say, even the closest to me. I also think when I advice people and want to help them, nobody thanks me for my work, or appreciate the fact that I tried to be my best to help them or even be a good person.

I am already hard of hearing and my words often come out too loud so people always think I am shouting when I am upset. At this point I feel traumatized. I am so lost inside my own head. I think nobody understands how I feel.

Regardless of all those factors, I was able to complete my university degree and become an educator but at this point I have decided that no matter what I do, nothing is worth it and it is a bother.

I don't even know if posting on here is the right idea. But I just want to let the world how I am feeling about myself or some place
 

Christinegirl

Moderator
Staff member
Don't change who you are, hon. Change who you're with.
Your words make a difference in this world. Words are powerful things. You're making a difference just by what you said here. You made a difference with me. :)

You have a right to speak up and you have a right to be heard.
And if you're not in the habit of lying, people should believe what you say (or at least keep an open mind). If they don't, it's a reflection on them and it may be they who are in the habit of lying. (It's often those who are closest to us/family members who treat us like this - because they think we have to put up with it.)

Likewise, if people don't appreciate what we do for them, that's also a reflection on them. Don't stop wanting to help those around you, hon. Just surround yourself with others who will acknowledge your work, your efforts, and recognize the fact that you try to be your best self.
You are a good person and you deserve to be with people who see that and are understanding of your circumstances. All they have to do is think back to a time when they had a head cold and their ears were blocked and how annoying and frustrating that was - just to slightly understand what you're going through. Of course it's no comparison to what you have to endure, but at least they can use their experience to be a little more compassionate towards you and what you go through all the time.

Do the people (who think you are shouting) know that your hearing isn't 100%?

That's the beauty of the internet: you can communicate with us, you can "step" outside of your own head and not have to worry about your voice level. And we can understand you perfectly. :)

Congratulations on completing your university degree! I don't have to tell you: it's not an easy thing to do.
And being an educator is such important work. It would be a shame if you did all that work, all that studying, for nothing.
Do you work with hearing impaired students? If not, you might want to see if you can get a position working in a school for the hearing impaired. The people who work there might be more understanding and open-minded/less judgmental.

We're glad you joined here and told us about what you're going through. It's also a reminder for the rest of us to appreciate what we have. Thank you. (。◕‿◕。)
 

Shhhone

New Member
Don't change who you are, hon. Change who you're with.
Your words make a difference in this world. Words are powerful things. You're making a difference just by what you said here. You made a difference with me. :)

You have a right to speak up and you have a right to be heard.
And if you're not in the habit of lying, people should believe what you say (or at least keep an open mind). If they don't, it's a reflection on them and it may be they who are in the habit of lying. (It's often those who are closest to us/family members who treat us like this - because they think we have to put up with it.)

Likewise, if people don't appreciate what we do for them, that's also a reflection on them. Don't stop wanting to help those around you, hon. Just surround yourself with others who will acknowledge your work, your efforts, and recognize the fact that you try to be your best self.
You are a good person and you deserve to be with people who see that and are understanding of your circumstances. All they have to do is think back to a time when they had a head cold and their ears were blocked and how annoying and frustrating that was - just to slightly understand what you're going through. Of course it's no comparison to what you have to endure, but at least they can use their experience to be a little more compassionate towards you and what you go through all the time.

Do the people (who think you are shouting) know that your hearing isn't 100%?

That's the beauty of the internet: you can communicate with us, you can "step" outside of your own head and not have to worry about your voice level. And we can understand you perfectly. :)

Congratulations on completing your university degree! I don't have to tell you: it's not an easy thing to do.
And being an educator is such important work. It would be a shame if you did all that work, all that studying, for nothing.
Do you work with hearing impaired students? If not, you might want to see if you can get a position working in a school for the hearing impaired. The people who work there might be more understanding and open-minded/less judgmental.

We're glad you joined here and told us about what you're going through. It's also a reminder for the rest of us to appreciate what we have. Thank you. (。◕‿◕。)
Thank you for your kind words. I do think I am so broken inside that I don't have an idea of what to do next.
and yes they do know, but unfortunately they can't seem to understand what it is like. They can't seem to understand that everyday for me is an internal battle with the world around me. They don't understand that 20 years of my life were a miss, because I did not get to experience the world with noises. I thought everyone heard the same way as I did, until one of my ears had hit profound hearing loss and I started to notice what I thought was normal to be gone. I was left undiagnosed for 20 years, nobody questioned why I was lacking in school, social life , or anything. But somehow I was over coming most of it because I was a child, in my adulthood it was equally challenging, but they more I grew older the more people grew against me. I think I have hit my breaking point. Perhaps you could say I developed a 6 sense that most hard of hearing people have.

I have already lost so much, and I know if my ears continued to drop, i will eventually become mute. But I guess I decided on it too early because it's not going to matter, I will just stop by my own will.

I teach English language as a subject. It's a good option to explore with hearing impaired individuals.

Thank you
 

Christinegirl

Moderator
Staff member
You're very welcome, hon. The wonderful thing about the human spirit is: even if we're broken inside, we can heal, mend and we become stronger for having had the experience.
I've also heard that when we lose/don't have one of our senses, our other senses (including a sixth sense) are heightened. ;)

Some people aren't very compassionate/understanding, are they! It's like they don't even want to sympathize - it's too much bother for them. But we don't need/want people like that in our lives anyway.

If you eventually become completely deaf, you still won't have to become mute if you don't want to. You just need to be with the right people - people who are understanding and non-judgemental. "Don't change who you are, change who you're with".

It's okay if you have no idea of what to do next - though I think teaching English to hearing impaired students is an excellent idea. I'm sure they'd appreciate having a good English teacher like you who understands where they're coming from. :)
 

Anthrodani

Member
So recently it came to my attention that for me in order to live it would be best to become mute. I don't feel like my words make difference or even if people believe what I say, even the closest to me. I also think when I advice people and want to help them, nobody thanks me for my work, or appreciate the fact that I tried to be my best to help them or even be a good person.

I am already hard of hearing and my words often come out too loud so people always think I am shouting when I am upset. At this point I feel traumatized. I am so lost inside my own head. I think nobody understands how I feel.

Regardless of all those factors, I was able to complete my university degree and become an educator but at this point I have decided that no matter what I do, nothing is worth it and it is a bother.

I don't even know if posting on here is the right idea. But I just want to let the world how I am feeling about myself or some place
Hi Shhone,
I think coming to the Girls forum was definitely a great step to share what you are going through. There will always be people that are willing to listen to your story and we are definitely some of them! Thank you for sharing your story...you are clearly a very strong woman and I don't even know how I would have overcome half the battles you have gone through your whole life. I encourage you not to become mute because there is so much that you can offer this world. As I too am studying to become a teacher I have a passion for teaching, encouraging and working with children and I think this is definitely an area where you can find your purpose in life, especially with individuals who are hearing impaired. You have something so important that you can offer and find so much joy in this area in your life. For me, there is nothing better than seeing a student understand a concept or make strides in something that I have personally taught them. It is such a magical feeling and something that can truly encourage you to continue to push your own limits!!
 
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