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Help talking to a guy I like


New Member
Context: I’m 19 and I’ve never been in a relationship or talked to boys too much. I’m prettt introverted but I’m starting to get out more.

So my friend has an ex coworker who we hang out (party) with in a small group sometimes. Friday night I went out with my friend (let’s call her Liz), this guy (let’s call him Bob), and one of his friends (also one of Liz’s ex-coworkers, lets call him Alex). We went to a couple bars, and Liz was having a tough time because her and Alex almost had a thing but wasn’t ready for a relationship, and was ignoring her. I was trying to be there for her but so was Bob (who didn’t know what was going on between them for the first part of the night), and we spent a lot of time in and out of the dance floor and stuff. Eventually Bob kissed me (and a bit more, but not like sex or anything), we were kinda drunk but not like blackout drunk or anything. At the end of the night he told me he wanted to hang out again with or without Liz, and kissed me good night. Liz said she talked to him because I told her I liked him, but idk if he really likes me back. We exchanged Snapchats and he was supposed to visit me at a volunteer job but he was called into work (legitimately, I checked with Liz to make sure he wasn’t bailing). We talked about how much fun we had the night before and he still seemed like he wanted to hang out some time. I told him to hit me up when he’s free, but I get the vibe that he’s the kinda guy that wants the girl to ask him out.

The problem is idk how to talk to guys! I’m Snapping him sometimes but I’m not sure if I should be outright or just wait for him to come to me. I feel bad asking Liz a lot of questions even though she knows him well, because she’s dealing with her own issues with Alex. I’m also afraid that half the things he said to me were only because he was drunk. We’ve only hung out a few times but I’ve liked him since we first met. He’s kinda opposite to me in that’s hes outgoing snd funny and likes to party (he’s out a few times a week with friends), but we get along well.

Anyways the question is: should I ask him to hang out directly or wait for him to ask me?


Staff member
If he doesn't ask you after awhile, I'd ask him out (especially as you get the vibe that he’s the kinda guy that wants the girl to ask him out. Though if he does, I hope it's not because he only wants to go out with someone if she'll pay for the food, drinks, etc.)

Hopefully he'll enjoy being with you, even if he's sober. But if he does go out with you, I hope it's because he wants to spend time with you and not because he wants to "make out" with you. (Some guys are like that - they only want to go on a date with someone if they can have sex with her, especially on the second or third date.)