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Got my self into a sticky situation with CRAZY ex again.

Hannah890

New Member
So girls about 8 months ago I was in a relationship that lasted about 9 months I broke up with him because he became very rude to me and possessive would want me wearing certain clothes didn’t want me going out. Every thing I did for him was thrown back in my face it was just a bad time for me the last month with him. We ended up on bad terms basically police was involved from domestic abuse and him showing up at my house drunk for months after we broke up. But now this is the problem I have been talking to this new guy for a few weeks and he asked me if my ex is my ex and I said yes. Turned out they are friends I had no clue I know they do the same job but didn’t know they are friends. I am still kinda talking to this guy and my ex knows we are I am just wonders should I carry on seeing this guy or is it not worth it. I feel like my ex is just going to make up lies about me to him if he isn’t already. Or it is going to cause problems and my ex will start showing up at my door again he is easily made angry. Or maybe my ex is over me and will let me move on.
 

Christinegirl

Moderator
Staff member
Because they're friends, I'd be careful. The fact that he asked you if your ex was your ex means he knows something. Whether it's just knowing your ex's previous home address or whether it's your ex talking at work about his previous relationship, or whatever, there's a connection.

Because they're friends, it might even be a case of your ex (being possessive and controlling) having asked his friend to get involved in your life, pretending to be interested in you as a boyfriend so your ex could know what's going on in your life - instead of him having to show up at your house (which he did months after you broke up).
A controller/an abuser often has difficulty letting go of his ex, especially if his ex broke up with him.

If you really care for this new guy, I'd approach with caution. Try not to divulge too much personal information, especially about your ex. In other words, assume everything you say and do will get back to your ex. Hopefully it won't, hopefully this new guy is involved with you because he likes you (and has no ulterior motive). But it's better to be safe than sorry.

And even if this new guy genuinely likes you, your ex may try to poison him against you - which would make the relationship difficult for you, in the best of circumstances.

Personally, if this new guy isn't someone special in your life, you may not want the potential hassle/drama of still being connected to your ex (even if it isn't a direct connection) - especially if he's the jealous type.

Your ex may be over you but I wouldn't depend on that being the case. You might like to file this one under "better to be safe than sorry", too.

Ultimately, it depends on whether or not you think this new guy is worth it (assuming he's not "working" on behalf of your ex).

Good luck, hon. Please let us know how things go. :)
 
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