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Blame-game

I was an introvert since my childhood, and I still am, presently. Thus, I rarely speak up during meetings and if told to do so, sometimes I stammer, making myself a laughing stock. My family blames me everytime for this, and it is really hurting my feelings, although I don't express it. Further, they are comparing me to the other members of the meetings, saying that they are 1000% better than me in all aspects, as they speak almost everytime in the meeting. I am beginning to experience a mental breakdown. What should I do?
 

Christinegirl

Well-Known Member
Get a different family, hon. :D

But seriously, that's rude of your family to say other people are better than you! Everyone has their strengths and "weaknesses" (and I'm pretty sure they don't know "every aspect" of the other people in the meeting - so they don't know what they're talking about!)
And even though you may not be an expert at public speaking - everyone I know gets very nervous when they have to speak before a group/audience. It's a normal, human reaction - I'm sure you're very good at other things.
For those who are comfortable speaking up at meetings, good for them. But we're not all the same (and it would probably be a kind of boring world if we were).

And there's nothing wrong with being an introvert. Some of the most talented artists (musicians, etc.) I know are introverts.

Lots of people stammer/stutter when they're uncomfortable. Again, it's a natural human response and if some people point fingers and ridicule, that's a reflection on them! No wonder you're affected by their behavior.

The bottom line is: you're with people who don't treat you very nicely, I'm sorry to say, hon. And people who do that usually have low self-esteem (even though they may not show it. But that's how they feel on the inside). And they take out their frustrations on others, especially those who are shy and gentle and probably won't fight back. It's what bullies do, too.
Whenever someone picks on me, I remind myself of this - knowing they don't like themselves and they're lashing out because they want others to feel as bad as they feel about themselves. It isn't about me, it's about them. (I'd feel bad about myself, too, if I picked on nice people - people who hadn't done anything wrong.) I use it as a reminder to always try to be nice and kind to people, just maybe try to be with a different group of people. In other words, I try to stay away from bullies and people who are mean, whenever possible. ;)

And for the record, a thousand percent is a mathematical impossibility - so slight exaggeration on their part! They're not as smart as they'd like to be, are they! :D
 
Get a different family, hon. :D

But seriously, that's rude of your family to say other people are better than you! Everyone has their strengths and "weaknesses" (and I'm pretty sure they don't know "every aspect" of the other people in the meeting - so they don't know what they're talking about!)
And even though you may not be an expert at public speaking - everyone I know gets very nervous when they have to speak before a group/audience. It's a normal, human reaction - I'm sure you're very good at other things.
For those who are comfortable speaking up at meetings, good for them. But we're not all the same (and it would probably be a kind of boring world if we were).

And there's nothing wrong with being an introvert. Some of the most talented artists (musicians, etc.) I know are introverts.

Lots of people stammer/stutter when they're uncomfortable. Again, it's a natural human response and if some people point fingers and ridicule, that's a reflection on them! No wonder you're affected by their behavior.

The bottom line is: you're with people who don't treat you very nicely, I'm sorry to say, hon. And people who do that usually have low self-esteem (even though they may not show it. But that's how they feel on the inside). And they take out their frustrations on others, especially those who are shy and gentle and probably won't fight back. It's what bullies do, too.
Whenever someone picks on me, I remind myself of this - knowing they don't like themselves and they're lashing out because they want others to feel as bad as they feel about themselves. It isn't about me, it's about them. (I'd feel bad about myself, too, if I picked on nice people - people who hadn't done anything wrong.) I use it as a reminder to always try to be nice and kind to people, just maybe try to be with a different group of people. In other words, I try to stay away from bullies and people who are mean, whenever possible.) ;)

And for the record, a thousand percent is a mathematical impossibility - so slight exaggeration on their part! They're not as smart as they'd like to be, are they! :D
Thank you ,❤❤
 
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