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It really depends on your height. I wear a short heel or flats most of the time (1 inch or shorter) due to my age, I used to wear higher. My daughter works in the business world and dresses business casual-professional every day. She is short and can get away with tall heels so hers average...
Try using a powder based scrub! I had the same problem and switched to ora's amazing herbal face powder scrub and add water to it. it's all natural i found that its not as coarse but still does the job. also you may need to put a face oil on after to help sooth and condition the skin.
scrub hard and rinse well to get as much out as possible then brush the top with a comb and don't go super close to the roots so you don't scratch more up. I have to do this whenever my scalp gets sunburned and starts peeling.